What Steps Should I Take When My Ex Violates Our Child Custody Agreement?
When one parent violates the custody agreement steps should be taken to prevent further issues.
Child custody is an explosive topic, as it can be challenging to parent with an ex-spouse, even in the best circumstances. When one parent violates the custody agreement, especially if this becomes a pattern, steps should be taken to preserve the available time with the child and prevent future issues. Parents who are unable to see their child according to the custody agreement often have a few different options for how to handle it. In most cases, the following steps are advised to handle an ex violating a child custody agreement.
Know What's a Violation
Anything that goes against the custody agreement is a violation, but some of them may not be enforceable. It is a violation if a parent refuses to provide their ex with the court-ordered visitation time. A violation can also occur when one parent interrupts the other parent's visitation, if they leave the state without the other parent's permission, or if they run away with the child in an attempt to avoid allowing the other parent to see the child. All these are considered violations, and the judge can order the parent in violation to follow the court-ordered agreement.
A violation can also occur if a parent doesn't use their visitation time. The courts can't force a parent to use their visitation time, but this could still be a violation. Suppose one parent routinely missed visitation with the child. In that case, it can be used to convince the judge to modify the child custody agreement and give more time to the parent who regularly cares for the child or increase child support payments.
Document Any Violations
Documenting is key when an ex is violating the child custody agreement. There needs to be evidence of the issues when taking the violations to court, and documenting can help track the evidence as needed. There are a few ways to document any violations. If possible, discuss visitation or a denial of visitation through text so the messages can be saved and used in court. When this isn't possible, write down the date and as many details as possible in a journal or calendar. If there are any witnesses to being refused visitation, get their contact information in case it's needed.
Have an Attorney Send a Letter
When a violation occurs, a letter from a divorce attorney in Cullman may be enough to get the other parent to stop whatever they're doing. An attorney can quote the relevant sections of the child custody agreement, formally request the other parent to stop violating the agreement, and warn of what can happen if the agreement continues to be violated. The letter is often enough to remind the other parent that they have to abide by the child custody agreement and that they can't just decide to change it or do something else.
Call the Police
If a parent doesn't return the children at the specified time or otherwise violates the agreement, it may be possible to call the police and have them step in to help. The potential for this to be successful can vary based on the child custody agreement and the specific situation. Even if the police are unable to help at the time, their report of the call can help the parent document and prove the violations in court.
File a Motion
Filing a motion is a way of requesting that the court intervenes and helps with the situation. The court can intervene in numerous ways, depending on the specific violation and how frequently violations occur.
Request Penalties Through Court
The court can order penalties ranging from fines to jail time based on the severity of the violation. Continuously arriving late to drop off the child will typically result in a fine, while an attempted parental kidnapping could lead to jail time. The judge will review the violations, the details of the agreement, and any supporting documents before making a decision.
Request a Change to the Agreement
Changing the child custody agreement may be necessary to help prevent violations. Changes can include rearranging the specified dates and times for drop-off and pick-up, adding in a specific location for dropping off and picking up the child, or requiring visitation to be supervised for the child's safety.
Request More Time with the Child
The parent not in violation of the order may file a motion to request more time with their child. They may request more frequent visits, to switch primary custody, or to remove visitation from their ex-spouse. It does take quite a bit of work and evidence to prove that removing visitation or limiting it to supervised only is a good idea for the child, but it can be done.
Do Not Refuse Visitation
It's tempting to get tired of the violations and withhold visits, especially if the parent is worried about the health and safety of their child with the other parent. However, it's rarely a good idea to refuse visitation. If visitation needs to be refused to keep the child safe, work with a lawyer to ensure it's done right and that the reasoning is well documented in case the court becomes involved. Lawyers may propose alternative options for the parent until the case can go before a judge again to help prevent the parent from violating the custody agreement.
Child custody agreements set through the courts should be followed as closely as possible, but that doesn't always happen. One parent may violate the agreement and withhold the child from the other parent or fail to keep up with drop-off and pick-up times. While this is a frustrating experience, it's not something parents have to tackle and solve independently. The courts have procedures in place to handle any violations.
If your ex has violated the child custody agreement, now's the time to take the next steps. If there is a potential for the child not to be returned, it may be beneficial to speak with law enforcement. In all other cases, talk to a lawyer immediately to learn more about what can be done.
